Silence, Swallowed -- Ar Tonelico fanfiction (Lyner, Misha, 718 words, no warnings)

I'll come back for you. I can't come every day, but I will keep coming back to see you again.

You can still hear me, right? You just can't answer me. So, I'll tell you what's going on in the world.

I'll tell you exactly what you’re saving out there....


"Misha."

The words of the Chronicle Key resounded within the room, its acoustics lending Misha's voice a richness the slight girl could never have produced on her own. The echoes filled the darkness, creating the illusion of a thousand Mishas singing there, the warmth of their words enveloping him like a blanket, pressing in on him like a shroud. With the only illumination a shaft of sun from a skylight high above-- and that seemingly more for atmosphere than to provide a light to see by-- the room felt tiny even though the depth of the sound told him otherwise, and the disparity unsettled him still further.

"Misha, I came back, just like I said." He looked up at her, perfectly poised, like a statue, an instrument cast in bronze. Nothing really felt appropriate to say to her. "Hi."

She kept on singing, of course, Chronicle Key flooding his mind with its imagery. He didn't understand the words, but the song was magic; the sentiment contained within it rang clear within his heart, unmistakeable as a clarion call. Oh, please, set down your weapons, let go your strength, rest, rest.... Her voice cried out to the world, tirelessly, and he could feel the world beginning with him, the song reverberating through every bone and sinew only to pass out the other end and continue on, leaving him forever marked. His muscles ached with the resonance, ached where she'd carved words into them, carved his flesh with sound.

"Misha... I... I want to tell you about...."

But the words wouldn't come. It wasn't just that trying to talk to her, while she sang there, unmoved by him, made him feel stupid; nor even that her stature, goddess-like, detached from the world yet praising it in the highest, seemed so far removed from the Misha he knew. It was that this chamber seemed to permit no other words, no other meanings, than those contained within the Chronicle Key. The song filled up all the available space, drowned out all other concepts. This was its place, and a place for it alone; any word that so much as tried to rise up against it would die.

That, he realised, was the power of Misha's song. It put all other intent to sleep. As long as she sang, nothing could occur in this chamber that was contrary, even tangential, to the Song.

He gave up trying to talk, then, and just watched her face. Her eyes were closed, further distancing her from her surroundings, though her eyelids flickered occasionally as the song's emotion stirred her. Her heart, he knew, was dancing constantly to the tune of it; she could not but feel its every sadness, its every plea, its every exultation as if they were truly her own. That was what she'd told him, once:

"--and I become the song."

There was no Misha there any more; not in that moment, not while she sang. The Song was the only thing that could truly live here; all else was submissive to its decree. She was only living song, only raw intent, only a singular will crystallised into the purest of tones: and that will belonged not to her, but to the Chronicle Key.

He watched her lips move in synchrony with it, almost as an afterthought, as if the Song would live regardless and she was only a front, like Tastiella, to make the whole thing seem less surreal. He watched her face, her shining face, the dim light rebounding off it and casting it in golden tones, faint sparkles on her cheeks where the light had picked out motes of dust.

Except those sparkles were moving down her face, in little channels and currents, and the note of her voice was cracking, and he knew that there was a Misha there, after all, trapped behind all that.

If her tears made sound when they hit the ground, Lyner was none the wiser, for their words were swallowed up by the Song.


From the author: Inspired by Tastiella's response to Lyner's asking if Misha could answer him: "No. She is singing. That is the only answer she can give you." I thought that was particularly poignant, and was imagining what would happen if Lyner went back to try and talk to her, as he said he would, before the Mir-possessed Shurelia kicked her out of the Chronicle.

HARMONIOUS_FUSION, in more than one sense...

...No, I did not find this by searching on what you think I searched on. (Warning: some mild AT2 spoilers behind link. If you want the file minus the spoilers, I've uploaded it here; credit goes to Palsa/Steven Hancock.)

What is it? It's the intros to Misha's and Mir's versions of Harmonious, mashed up together. It sounds really, really nice; surprisingly nice for what is basically one track laid on top of another. It's pretty musically, and it's pretty in concept, that concept being "Misha and Mir singing together, awwww". Too bad it's only the intro, and it cuts out pretty abruptly (another second or two on the playtime would have been nice); I'd have liked it to go on still further, but I suppose the full versions overlaid would have sounded awfully cacophonous. (Edit: I've tried. They do. Ah well.)

In any case, this gave me happy musical shivers, so I thought I'd share so you could all get happy musical shivers too. :)

eating, sleeping and breathing song magic

So I'm playing through Misha's path right now for the first time, and I've noted that she says that she really was singing constantly: from sunrise to sunset, and to sunrise again. It really sounds like she didn't sleep, and I seem to recall that one of the talk topics around this time confirms that she was only able to sleep normally recently.

So it's pretty much assured that she didn't eat, drink or sleep as a regular person would need to. Therefore, I'm imagining she must have had to be on some sort of life support; constantly hooked up to a machine that would give her nutrients, shut down parts of her brain on a preset schedule so that she could get something resembling rest while still singing, and so forth. Or perhaps the lack of rest is why Star Singers die so young; but presumably she would need at least some infusion of chemicals and energy to keep her awake, and this assumes that Reyvateils don't quickly go mad from lack of sleep, as humans would.

Does anyone have any ideas on how the heck Misha, or any of the Star Singers, stayed alive all that time?

Also, I've noted that she talks about "a silver fence with treasure behind it" in one of her talk topics, but we couldn't see a fence like this in the Chronicle. What specifically is going on with this? (Yes, bear with me, this is the first time I've played Misha's path. Not actually having the game with me impedes my ability to replay somewhat.)

On trust, obligation and the meaning of being chosen

A friend sent me this thoughtful essay, and asked if I would post it here because I actually have an AT-related blog, and I was happy to oblige. See my comments after the essay itself.


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When Lyner brings back the Hymn Crystal Purger, Leard tells him to give it to "the Reyvateil he trusts the most". And of course, because it's a dating sim, the player has to choose which girl he wants to get on the good side of. Dating sims inherently set out to pit the girls in competition with each other and make you choose.

But the choice of who should extract shouldn't be based on who the player likes best, or even whom Lyner seems to have the most reason to trust. We're talking about the fate of the world, which is a bit more important than a love triangle; the more important consideration is doing what has to be done. On the practical side, a certain amount of trust between partners has got to be necessary for a Reyvateil to successfully extract, yes. But I trusted both Aurica and Misha. And casting a spell to save the world shouldn't be a matter of a popularity contest, or whom I liked better; there are various factors regarding who would be better at it-- who's "levelled up" more in their skills, or who is most compatible with the spell.

Furthermore, though, who says that getting to extract the crystal is a treat that would really earn the girl's favour? Shouldn't we ask who is willing to volunteer to do such a thing, and who wants to defer? I chose not the one I liked best, but the one I thought would benefit more from being chosen. To Aurica, it meant the world: all her life she'd been told she was inferior, and finally someone said to her, "This is the most important job in the world, and I choose you." Finally someone thought she was capable of handling something important-- and not just any average task, but something on which everyone's lives depended. Such a choice could absolutely change her life, could be the fulfillment of all of her hopes and dreams. So I chose Aurica.

I'd like to play through it again choosing Misha, to see what it's like and to see more of her backstory-- yet I think I'm going to have trouble bringing myself to do that to Misha. Surely the last thing she wants is to have the higher-ups in Platina ordering her to go sing for them. She spent her whole life being told, "Misha, you have to do this; Misha, you have to sing that. Misha, our fate rests on you; Misha, you have an obligation"; and she's sick to death of it. After Lyner came along and cared about what she wanted to do with her life, wanted to take her places and give her presents, after she came to see him as someone who could understand her hopes and fears and treat her like a person with the choice to follow her own volition, the last thing she probably wants is to hear about her obligations to save everyone with her endless singing from him, too!

It seems that being chosen to extract the Hymn Crystal Purger would be a terrible burden for Misha, and a dream come true for Aurica. I don't think it's fair to choose any other way. Yet it's not necessarily reflective of my personal choices or my trust in the girls. I don't want the game to record that I've favoured Aurica over Misha by choosing her, or that I trust Misha any less. I want Misha to be happy, not to feel let down by Lyner's ignoring her yet again. I want Lyner to go and have a talk with her and tell her that he cares about her feelings, and that that's why he's not choosing her.

It's one of the few situations in Ar Tonelico with the potential to make everyone happy; but the choice is framed in such a way that it spoils the potential that could have been. Dating sims seem hell-bent on making some of the girls miserable, which is a shame. There is so often a better way.

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As for my thoughts... I personally think it's very true, and I think that Lyner never asks these things, never gives anyone a choice but just rolls along with what he's going to do anyway, is the cause of a lot of the plot's problems. Lyner never asks "well, what would you like?" He waits for everyone else to ask or else he steamrollers over them. And it really feels like he almost never talks to anyone about the kind of things he really should be talking to them about, like "Aurica, how do you feel about the fact that I dive into Misha?" or "Misha, I don't want to burden you with this responsibility, and it would make Aurica so happy. I think this is best for everyone, and it's not that I don't trust you, so ignore what my dad says. I'm choosing for my own reasons."

Well, now I know what Misha might look like if she were in this world...

...seriously, just... awwwwwwwww.

Good cosplay of my favourite characters is something that'll always win me over; good cosplay staged in appropriate settings, even moreso. (The Crescent Chronicle picture is particularly aww-worthy, in my book.) I kind of wish she'd saved the images at higher quality, because the pixellisation kind of spoils them; but other than that, hats off to Sei Kein Zala for some truly impressive work that also simultaneously reveals the secret of how Misha gets those drums to stay up in her hair.

Now if only we can get some Mirs and Ayatanes out there; I trust that you'll all keep me updated on this matter. ;) I'd sort of like to try Ayatane myself, but that armour is ridiculous, and would take more skill than I have to make and more money than I should spend to commission, most likely. Still, it'd be so much fun to run around as him. I would shout "Q" at things a lot. XD

overwriting rogue programming: harder than you'd think

My friends send me awesome things in the mail. That, I think, is all that needs to be said.

(I'm still tickled by the idea of Harmonious as a hotfix, too. :)

Posted with permission.